Saturday, May 19, 2012
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EIL Quotes

Consciousness of Context

Environmental Awareness

  • In order to understand people, we have to understand their way of life and approach. If we wish to convince them, we have to use their language in the narrow sense of the mind. Something that goes even much further than that is not the appeal to logic and reason, but some kind of emotional awareness of the other people.—Nehru, Indian statesman
  • Culture hides more than it reveals and strangely enough what it hides, it hides most effectively from its own participants. Years of study have convinced me that the real job is not to understand foreign culture but to understand our own.—Edward T. Hall, anthropologist

Group Savvy

  • Synergy is the highest activity of life; it creates new untapped alternatives; it values and exploits the mental, emotional, and psychological differences between people.—Stephen R. Covey, author, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People
  • The key elements in the art of working together are how to deal with change, how to deal with conflict, and how to reach our potential…the needs of the team are best met when we meet the needs of individual persons.—Max DePree, author, Leadership Jazz

Consciousness of Self

Emotional Self-Perception

  • Emotions get in the way but they don’t pay me to start crying at the loss of 269 lives. They pay me to put some perspective on the situation.—Ted Koppel, journalist
  • I choose not to give energy to the emotions of revenge, hatred, or the desire to subjugate.—Rosanne Cash, singer
  • I could work out a lot of my emotions by going to class and dancing.—Suzanne Farrell, ballerina

Honest Self-understanding

  • Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an under- standing of ourselves.—Carl Jung, psychologist
  • People of the world don’t look at themselves, and so they blame one another.—Rumi, poet and philosopher
  • Know thyself.—Socrates, philosopher
Healthy Self-Esteem
  • Never bend your head. Always hold it high. Look the world straight in the face.—Helen Keller, author
  • You can do what you have to do, and sometimes you can do it even better than you think you can.—Jimmy Carter, thirty-ninth president of the United States of America
  • If only you could sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.—Fred Rogers, host of Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood

Emotional Self-Control

  • Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary.—Mark Twain, author
  • When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but creatures of emotion.—Dale Carnegie, author of How to Win Friends and Influence People
  • People don’t ask for facts in making up their minds. They would rather have one good, soul-satisfying emotion than a dozen facts.—Robert Keith Leavitt, author

Authenticity

  • If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.— Mark Twain, author
  • Let the people know the truth and the country is safe.— Abraham Lincoln, sixteenth president of the United States of America
  • The truth is the kindest thing we can give folks in the end.— Harriet Beecher Stowe, author, Uncle Tom’s Cabin

Flexibility

  • Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless—like water. Now you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup, you put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, you put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.—Bruce Lee, actor
  • As any jazz musician knows, it takes flexibility and adaptability for improvisation to create beauty.—Doc Childre and Bruce Cryer, authors, From Chaos to Coherence
  • New ideas stir from every corner. They show up disguised inno- cently as interruptions, contradictions, and embarrassing dilem- mas. Beware of total strangers and friends alike who shower you with comfortable sameness, and remain open to those who make you uneasy, for they are the true messengers of the future.—Rob Lebow, author, A Journey into the Heroic Environment

Optimism

  • I believe that traditional wisdom is incomplete. A composer can have all the talent of Mozart and a passionate desire to succeed, but if he believes he cannot compose music, he will come to nothing. He will not try hard enough. He will give up too soon when the elusive right melody takes too long to materialize.— Martin Seligman, author, Learned Optimism
  • Leaders with that kind of talent are emotional magnets; people naturally gravitate to them. If you think about the leaders
  • with whom people most want to work in an organization, they probably have this ability to exude upbeat feelings. It’s one reason emotionally intelligent leaders attract talented people—for the pleasure of working in their presence.—Daniel Goleman, Richard Boyatzis, and Annie McKee, authors, Primal Leadership

Initiative

  • Success seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don’t quit.—Conrad Hilton, founder, Hilton Hotels
  • I would rather regret the things I have done than the things I have not.—Lucille Ball, actress
  • If opportunity doesn’t knock—build a door.—Milton Berle, actor

Achievement

  • It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.—Sir Edmund Hillary, mountaineer
  • That some achieve great success, is proof to all that others can achieve it as well.—Abraham Lincoln, sixteenth president of the United States of America
  • You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else.—Albert Einstein, theoretical physicist

Consciousness of Others

Empathy

  • Successful leaders lead with the heart, not just the head. They possess qualities like empathy, compassion and courage. They also have the ability to establish deep, long-term and genuine relation- ships where others trust them.—Bill George, author, True North
  • How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striv- ing and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these.—George Washington Carver, American educator and inventor

Inspiration

  • People are not lazy. They simply have impotent goals—that is, goals that do not inspire them.—Anthony Robbins, motiva- tional speaker
  • Good actions give strength to ourselves and inspire good actions in others.—Plato, philosopher
  • Our chief want is someone who will inspire us to be what we know we could be.—Ralph Waldo Emerson, poet

Influence

  • Clearly the leader who commands compelling causes has an extraordinary potential influence over followers. Followers armed by moral inspiration, mobilized and purposeful, become zealots and leaders in their own right.—James MacGregor Burns, author, Leadership
  • People change what they do less because they are given analysis that shifts their thinking than because they are shown a truth that influences their feelings.—John Kotter, author, The Heart of Change
  • Leaders not only influence followers but are under their influence as well.—Ron Heifetz, author, Leadership Without Easy Answers

Teamwork

  • All great relationships, the ones that last over time, require pro- ductive conflict in order to grow. This is true in marriage, parent- hood, friendship, and certainly business.—Patrick Lencioni, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team
  • When a team outgrows individual performance and learns team confidence, excellence becomes a reality.—Joe Paterno, football coach, Pennsylvania State University

Conflict Management

  • If we manage conflict constructively, we harness its energy for creativity and development.—Kenneth Kaye, author
  • When conflict becomes a win-lose contest in our minds, we immediately try to win.—Thomas Crum, author and presenter
  • Never in this world can hatred be stilled by hatred; it will be stilled only by non-hatred; this is the law eternal.—Siddhartha Gautama, founder of Buddhism
Developing Relationships
  • Whenever you’re in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.—William James, psychologist and philosopher
  • Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”—C. S. Lewis, author, Chronicles of Narnia
  • All I can say is the most important part of being in a relationship is that you love the person for who they are.—Liv Tyler, actress

Coaching

  • Make sure that team members know they are working with you, not for you.—John Wooden, former UCLA basketball coach
  • Our chief want in life is somebody who makes us do what we can.—Ralph Waldo Emerson, philosopher and poet
  • Coaching is a profession of love. You can’t coach people unless you love them.—Eddie Robinson, football coach, Grambling State University

Citizenship

  • Let us at all times remember that all American citizens are brothers of a common country, and should dwell together in bonds of fraternal feeling.—Abraham Lincoln, sixteenth president of the United States of America
  • A nation, as a society, forms a moral person, and every member of it is personally responsible for his society.—Thomas Jefferson, third president of the United States of America

Change Agent

  • There is nothing wrong with change, if it is in the right direction.—Winston Churchill, former British prime minister
  • Leadership is a relationship, founded on trust and confidence. Without trust and confidence, people don’t take risks. Without risks, there’s no change. Without change, organizations and move- ments die. Whatever the challenge, all involve a change from the status quo.—Kouzes and Posner, authors, The Leadership Challenge
  • The single most important message of this book is very simple. People change what they do less because they are given analysis that shifts their thinking than because they are shown a truth that influences their feelings.—John Kotter, author, The Heart of Change
Capitalizing on Difference
  • The price of the democratic way of life is a growing appreciation of people’s differences, not merely as tolerable, but as the essence of a rich and rewarding human experience.—Jerome Nathanson, journalist
  • If we cannot end now our differences, at least we can help make the world safe for diversity.—John F. Kennedy, thirty-fifth presi- dent of the United States of America
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The EIL Suite

Image of Emotionally Intelligent Leadership: A Guide for College Students

Capacities:

Being transparent and trustworthy. Authenticity is a complex concept that emphasizes the importance of being trustworthy, transparent, and living in a way in which words match actions and vice versa. This is no small order.  Beingauthentic means, in part, that emotionally intelligent leaders follow through on commitments and present.

Found in: Consciousness of Self

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Building on assets that come from differences with others. Capitalizing on difference suggests that differences are seen as assets, not barriers. Difference may mean race, socio-economic status, religion, sexual orientation, or gender as well as ability, personality, or philosophy. When capitalized upon, these differences create a larger perspective — a more inclusive view. Emotionally intelligent leaders use these differences as an opportunity to help others grow, develop, and ultimately capitalize on them.

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Seeking out and working with others toward new directions. As change agents, emotionally intelligent leaders look for opportunities for improvement or innovation — they think about possibilities and are future oriented. They see how change may benefit one person, an organization, or a whole community, and work to make this change happen.

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Helping others enhance their skills and abilities. Emotionally intelligent leaders know that they cannot do everything themselves. They need others to become a part of the endeavor. Coaching is about intentionally helping others demonstrate their talent and requires the emotionally intelligent leader to prioritize the time to foster the development of others in the group — not just themselves.

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Identifying and resolving problems and issues with others. Emotionally intelligent leaders understand that conflict is part of any leadership experience. When managed effectively, conflict can foster great innovation. At times conflict is overt and may involve anger, raised voices, or high
levels of frustration. Other times conflict is below the surface and shows itself only through cliques, side conversations, and apathy. Emotionally intelligent leaders are aware of these dynamics and work to manage them.

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Recognizing and fulfilling your responsibility for others or the group. Emotionally intelligent leaders must be aware of what it means to be a part of something bigger than themselves. An essential component is to fulfill the ethical and moral obligations inherent in the values of the community. As a result, emotionally intelligent leaders know when to give of themselves for the benefi t of others and the larger group.

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Thinking intentionally about the environment of a leadership situation. The larger system, or environment, directly influences an individual’s ability to lead.

Aspects of the environment affect the psychological and interpersonal dynamics of any human interaction. Emotionally intelligent leaders are in tune with a variety of factors such as community traditions and customs, the political environment, and major institutions (e.g., religion, government).

Found in: Consciousness of Context

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Interpreting the situation and/or networks of an organization. Every group has written/unwritten rules, ways of operating, customs and rituals, power dynamics, internal politics, inherent values and so forth. Emotionally intelligent leaders know how to diagnose and interpret these dynamics. Demonstrating group savvy enables one to have a direct influence on the work of the group.

Found in: Consciousness of Context

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Creating connections between, among, and with people. Developing relationships is a skill as well as a mind-set. This capacity requires emotionally intelligent leaders to build relationships and create a sense of trust and mutual interest. Simply put, individuals, groups, and organizations are stronger, smarter, and more effective when they are rooted in and facilitate positive relationships

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Understanding others from their perspective. Emotionally intelligent leadership and, more specifically, the capacity of empathy are about perceiving the emotions of others. When leaders display empathy, they have the opportunity to build healthier relationships, manage difficult  situations,and develop trust more effectively. Being empathetic requires an individual to have a high level of self – awareness as well as awareness of others.

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Demonstrating skills of persuasion. Emotionally intelligent leaders have the ability to persuade others with information, ideas, emotion, behavior, and a strong commitment to organizational values and purpose. They involve others to engage in a process of mutual exploration and action.

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Motivating and moving others toward a shared vision. Being perceived as an inspirational individual by others is an important capacity of emotionally intelligent leadership. Inspiration works through relationships. Effective leadership entails generating feelings of optimism and commitment to organizational goals through individual actions, words, and accomplishments.

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Working effectively with others in a group. Emotionally intelligent leaders know how to work with others to bring out the best in each team member. By facilitating good communication, creating shared purpose, clarifying roles, and facilitating results, emotionally intelligent leaders foster group cohesion and truly develop a sense of togetherness that leads to desired results.

Found in: Consciousness of Others

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Being driven to improve according to personal standards. An important nuance of this capacity is the role of personal standards. Individuals often know achievement when they see and feel it. Instead of letting others define what achievement looks like, emotionally intelligent leaders pursue their passions and goals to a self – determined level of accomplishment. This drive produces results and may inspire others to become more focused in their efforts or to work at increased levels as well.

Found in: Consciousness of Self

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Consciously moderating your emotions and reactions. Although feeling emotions and being aware of them is part of this statement, so too is regulating them. Emotional self-control is about both awareness (being conscious of feelings) and action (managing emotions and knowing when and how to show them). Recognizing feelings, understanding how and when to demonstrate those feelings appropriately, and taking responsibility for one’s emotions (versus being victims of them) are critical components of this capacity.

Found in: Consciousness of Self

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Identifying your emotions and reactions and their impact on you. Emotional self-perception means that individuals are acutely aware of their feelings (in real time). In addition, emotional self – perception means understanding how these feelings lead to behaviors. Having emotional self-perception also means that emotionally intelligent leaders have a choice as to how they respond. This capacity enables one to differentiate between the emotions felt and the actions taken. In most situations, both healthy and unhealthy responses are available.

Found in: Consciousness of Self

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Being open and adaptive to changing situations. The best laid plans don’t always come to fruition, so emotionally intelligent leaders need to be responsive to change and open to feedback. By thinking creatively and using their problem – solving skills, emotionally intelligent leaders engage others in determining a new way to reach their goals.

Found in: Consciousness of Self

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Being aware of your own strengths and limitations. Honest self- understanding means that an individual celebrates and honors their strengths and talents while acknowledging and addressing limitations. Honest self-understanding means accepting the good and bad about one’s personality, abilities, and ideas. When emotionally intelligent leaders demonstrate honest self-understanding, they embody a foundational capacity of effective leadership — the ability to see a more holistic self and understand how this impacts their leadership.

Found in: Consciousness of Self

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Having a balanced sense of self. Emotionally intelligent leaders possess a high level of self-worth, are confident in their abilities, and are willing to stand up for what they believe in. They are also balanced by a sense of humility and the ability to create space for the opinions, perspectives, and thoughts of others.

To learn more about this capacity click on the following links to best suit your interests: multimedia, resources, learning activities.”

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Wanting and seeking opportunities. Emotionally intelligent leaders understand and take initiative. This means being assertive and seeking out opportunities. Emotionally intelligent leaders have to both see the opportunity for change and make it happen. Demonstrating initiative means that individuals take action and help the work of the group move forward.

Found in: Consciousness of Self

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Emotionally intelligent leaders demonstrate a healthy, positive outlook and display a positive regard for the future. Optimism is a powerful force that many overlook. When demonstrated effectively, optimism is contagious and spreads throughout a group or organization.

Found in: Consciousness of Self

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